In this Winter of Wellness, I am birthing my own awakening. I give thanks to the powerful influences in my life that act as “point people” walking three steps ahead of me. Barbara Marx=Hubbaard (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtC3miggFFY&list=FLyN3uxhJGfaOsY4yKxnYUYw&index=9&feature=plpp_video). Rev. Micheal Beckwith (http://www.agapelive.com/ ).Marianne Williamson (http://www.marianne.com/).
With their excellent modeling, I move with grace into spaces that used to be beyond my own comfort zone. Barbara has shown me the power of connecting great ”left brain” ideas to Essence. Michael preaches from the heart, standing on a podium with his eyes closed, simply allowing for Spirit to flow through him. Marianne has the power to bring focus and awareness to an issue; she will gently question the client for more clarity before she aligns with them and offers up prayer, calling forth Miracles.
What I am birthing now is a weaving of left/right brain in myself.
Suddenly, many of the weird aspects of my life are falling into place. I now know why I was a biochemistry major with a minor in cultural anthropology, all those many years ago as a pre-med student in a liberal arts college. My background allows me to find communicable language for the phenomenon of the physiological shift that I feel in my own body. Now I have the words to ask my clients questions about their own transformation. Not only can I look inward and scan my pineal gland (do you know WHERE/WHAT your pineal gland is?) for health and growth, I can support others in getting clear on their own Awakenings. Cultural anthropology allowed me to wake up to the Old Story/ need a NEW story of Dominator culture, long before others began to speak of the need to Awaken the Dreamer (www.pachamama.org). That science social science background has served me well as I sink into understanding and enthusiasm for Brian Swimme’s insights on the power of the Universe (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WE4XdGeduTg), even as I translate it for friends who hear Brian and register a big fat blank…
“Everyone is doing the best that they can” is my mantra of compassion, as a recovered workaholic, as a recovered (quiet and cold) rage-aholic, and as an overly time focused human being.
“I am a spiritual being, having a human experience” is my other.
I take this time, right now to review in awe what has happened to me, since becoming an Agent of Conscious Evolution:
1. I opened to love, and re-connected with a former fiance (who had broken our engagement). Through the 12 weeks of the course, our relationship deepened. I left a job, and moved in with him., preparing to “Snowbird” together in the Southwest, in a trailer, in the desert. I practiced a ”more sustainable”lifestyle, living with him in an “off the grid” existence. In October, we became engaged again. Chop wood. Carry water. Much happiness .
2. Catastrophe, in December. Ten days before Christmas, my fiance broke our engagement, for the second time. This was a great tempering experience for my ego, and an amazing opportunity to move into my Essence. The mantras fed me. Miracles happened at an astonishing rate, erery day.
3. Catastrophe #2, in December. The 21 year old friend of my 23 year old son fell 200 feet to his death, in a hiking accident in Sonoma, Arizona. My dance ommunity– we who had raised this child together since meeting him in utero, were stunned. I witnessed the finest in us all; and we midwifed ourselves through the worst in us. This death experience became a cauldron of healing for FOUR communites. Complicated issues of religion (the Islamic members of his Morrocan family vetoed cremation; how to get the body “back East to their Brooklyn home from Arizona without paying thousands?), patterned chaos (can anyone find the actively alcoholic birth father on the streets of New York, in time for the memorial?), and culture clash (five hippie types reassuring the Seventh Day Adventist sister that her brother’s grief over the loss of his step-son needed WITNESSED SPACE and breathwork, not an ambulance ride to the E.R.) all managed to dance together.
4. Miracles, continue. I moved the last items out of my ex-fiance’s home on December 30th. On December 31st, my blind date with a friend of a friend’s become an experience of The Sacred Couple. We two deeply wounded ones opened ourselves to Essence, and were initiated into priest/preistess space of the Morpho-erotic field. More on that, in a later post.
5. And finally, there is the circle. I am in communities where children learn circle process at their parent’s knees. At that Brooklyn funeral, attended by Muslims, Jews, pagans, Christians, and atheists, by Morrocans, African-Amreicans, Whites and Asians, by street-wise Brookly neighbors of the deceased and by wise elders of the Rainbow tribe, we had circle process. Space, for eeryone to see and hear each other.
What I am birthing now is a deep confidence that we truly ARE the ones that we’ve been waiting for. May this birth process be orgasmic (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5bm9-B6Ec4)!
